Cultural Differences When Western Men Marry Filipino Women

One thing that you can safely say that most Asian cultures share when it comes to the women is that they are looked at as second class to the men of these societies. I could cite many things that show this in these cultures but to me it’s obvious and that’s not the purpose of this article. I am most familiar with Filipino women so I will stick with what I know best here.

I have been married to a Filipina for over 3 years now and been living in the Philippines for most of that time. So I have been exposed to then the most. When it comes to the main differences between western women and Filipinas the Filipina has what I call the “que sera sera” attitude along with the general population. This is great if like the laid back atmosphere it brings. The level of happiness that these people have even in troubled times is amazing. However it has its drawbacks also. This being that when things do go wrong and they have an opportunity to learn from it and not make the same mistake in the future.

This attitude prevents the learning process from ever starting. Which will just about guarantee that the same mistakes will be made. This will be more common if you live in the Philippines as I do. Mainly because the other good part of this attitude is that they do adjust very well to living in the western world when you take your wife back home. For example my wife lived in Japan for 15 years. When I went there to meet her the first time she seemed to be one of the most organized people I ever knew. She was punctual and used her time wisely. Well it seemed as soon as she stepped foot back on Philippine soil she lost all that. I was wondering what had happened to the girl I met in Japan. After realizing that the general population here is the same I had to realize that she really didn’t have much choice in the matter because she would constantly be angry about people never being on time and plans never working out. Just how I was for the first 6 months I lived here until I realized it was something I had to deal with or live a very stressful life.

Next on my list of importance is religion. Although most Filipinas are Catholic or some form if Christianity and they most all are dedicated to it. They go to their respected church one to three times a week for mass and pray on a regular basis. They read their bibles all the time and pretty much live a Christian life. Accept for the Muslims of course. However even the Muslims who are just as dedicated to their religion are not beyond the superstitions that are engrained in most every Filipino. Men and women alike. It really don’t matter what religion they are the superstitions they have built up for probably thousands of years seems to always trump what ever the may find in the Bible or Koran. They all believe in what is known here as the Aswang. It is a ghost witch that can possess you and make you do evil things such as kill and eat your neighbors or family for that matter. Some of my wife’s distant cousins have actually claimed to be this and said that they could eat your liver by just looking at you. This is just one of hundreds of other superstitions they have here. They differ depending on what part of the Philippines they come from but most all are outlandish from a westerners point of view. You can find any number of these by doing a simple search on the internet.

There are other minor cultural differences with Filipinas but I consider these to be the ones that should be considered the most by somebody who has the desire to marry a Filipina.